Tearing Down the Tree: A Journey to True Forgiveness

I’ve learned that unforgiveness is a seed, a small, quiet thing planted deep in the soil of the soul. Left unchecked, it sprouts. It grows. And over time, it becomes a tree.

Not a tree of life, though. A toxic tree.

The kind that bears the fruit of bitterness, anger, pride, resentment... even hatred. Its branches stretch into parts of your life that have nothing to do with the original hurt. You find yourself snapping at people who love you. Distrusting those who haven’t wronged you. Building walls you don’t even remember putting up.

All because of one seed you never pulled out.

What Unforgiveness Really Does

They say,

“Unforgiveness is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.”

But it’s worse than that. Unforgiveness is cutting off your own oxygen tube just to watch someone else gasp. It’s forsaking your own safety in hopes that the person who hurt you crashes first. It’s trying to push them off a cliff, only to find you’re the one falling.

It’s quiet self-destruction masked as vengeance. And it never brings peace.

Release Before It Roots

Don’t let things build up. Say what you need to say. Speak up, not to start conflict, but to release the pressure building inside you. Holding it in only feeds the seed.

Releasing is healthy. It helps you weed out the bitterness before it takes root and grows into something much harder to undo.

What Is True Forgiveness?

True forgiveness is freedom. Not just from the other person but from the version of yourself that was wounded, angry, and chained to that pain.

It’s being able to talk to them… and not feel that tightness in your chest. It's being able to communicate like nothing ever happened, not because you’re pretending, but because you’ve truly released it. It's forgetting, not in the literal sense, but choosing not to relive the hurt every time you see them.

Forgiveness isn’t weakness. It's strength because it takes more power to heal than to hate.

Time Is a Healer… and a Revealer

Forgiveness takes time, and that’s okay. You can't rush a heart that’s been broken. You can’t force soil to heal overnight.

But if you make it your mission to forgive...with sincerity...with intention...with love

You start tearing down the tree. One branch at a time. One memory at a time. One prayer at a time.

My Mission, Your Mission

I’ve made it my mission to forgive. To release. To love.

Even when it’s hard. Even when it feels unfair. Even when I feel like holding on to the pain gives me power.

Because it doesn’t. It controls me.

So if you’re reading this, and there’s someone you need to forgive, start today. Let the roots come up. Let the soil breathe. Make space for new seeds of peace, clarity, love, and healing.

Forgiveness won’t always happen fast… But it will happen if you’re willing to let it.

Final Words

True forgiveness is not saying, “It didn’t hurt.” It’s saying, “It hurt… but I choose to heal anyway.” And healing is holy.

Let’s tear down the toxic trees. Let’s plant gardens of grace instead.

— Alexya Sawyer

The Serenic Mind